A new little ditty .....

I'm having problems with my brain. Things came to a head today in that I was not able to take a simple action which might have brought a positive change to my life. It was really a heart problem, but, you know, your heart is all in your head.

I am one messed up 62-year-old man-child.

Things got a little weird. I came to the conclusion that in order to solve the problem of my heart, it would be best to not want to have one. A heart, that is.

Yeah, and I here I am giving a shit again. I mean, I've made it this far. 62! And now I want it to be over with again, like I did when I was 9 and 16 and 28 and 33 and 43 and 55? At least I'm consistent.

I don't know how. I'd thought I'd been on only one date in my life, but on further reflection realized that if I really stretched the definition, I've been on nine. Over the last 46 years. Not a lot of practice. Horrible nighttime date, arranged…

Two different small-size guitars; one a "proper" electric with microtonal frets in the top half of the fingerboard, the other a toy but with metal strings tuned to the same scale as an egg slicer. Two different recordings of each, all through…

I was thinking about him earlier today, and then this came out of me, with its simple majesty, its quiet horror. I wonder what title they gave him in Hell.