Spandex Man

Reg was reading the paper today about the Spandex vigilante. Now Reg has got himself sorted becoming a superhero appeals to him. Ummmm about the suit i think it should be Blue to match my eyes with a large TTR motif of some sort on the chest in maybe a fetching red and white, i’ll get my oll lady onto the stiching in the morning……I’m sure i’ve still got a crash helmet and some goggles and motorbike boots and those welding gauntlets might just finish it off nicely…..now for a name ….What could it be?????……Then Reg woke up abruptly as the barman tapped his head with his wet cloth……………

Spandex man

I’m getting out the spandex
I’m putting on the suit
it’s time to pursue the evil in the neighborhood
i am the watch word, I formed the group
i’ll keep you safe, from San Diego to Washington state
I patrol after dark
When the thugs come out
Down by the bridge they drink and shout
when you, their cash machines, come passing by
They want a with drawl cause they want to get high
they have your pin numbers on their fists
Thats when you need me Mr Dontgiveashit
in my bright coloured spandex and my bullet proof vest
You no longer laugh as i put them to the test
My martial arts and my Taser gun
Are all the special powers that i ever have
They seem enough when i bang it to there chests and they fall down

Hey they don’t expect it, they think me the fool, not societies most useful tool
The vigilante in fancy dress, who’s cleaning it up, wiping up the mess
I took my inspiration from the comic book
My hard hat from the garage shelf, i’m out there giving you help
I’m Yul Brinner, Steve Mqueen i’m out there man i’m gonna get the place clean
We are Mocked by the world who doesn’t understand
were gonna clean it up were the spandex men
Theres Mr Xtreme in his green helmet, goggles and bright yellow cape
In Minneapolis there Razorhawk, who supplies his team with capes batons and vests
Were all out there trying to do our best
Were the spandex men, were gonna save the world
Were the superhero’s doing good deeds
Stopping the drugs, fighting the war
Were on your side but we need more
So why don’t you put, the spandex on
Come and fight and join the throng
Were the modern mythology
Marketing our deeds
lets get out there make the criminals bleed

We help the homeless and we tackle the crime
We confront the drug dealers get them a little time
To sit an contemplate there heinous crimes
Society, we have had enough
its time to turn and fight
When i put the spandex on i’m ready for the fight
Phoenix Jones prowls around Seattle
Beneath the underpasses breaking up the brawls
Armed with his martial art expertise
He will help you if your in the need
You can contact him at the comic book shop
He’s always ready to give the criminals a shock
Where he changes into his spandex suit
In the concealed chamber hidden by the books
The police department have blackballed the idea
Saying Phoenix has good intentions but were concerned for his safety they mention
“You cant go walking into rough neighborhoods in your bright smart spandex suits, wandering in the dark of night, your only going to get and find a fight. It’s not against the law, to wander there, but, you don’t need the spandex man, just call 911 and you’ll get a policeman in a nice smart suit”