Regretting the day A confused phlebotomist Mislabeled my tube.

Many haiku float Around, about this full head-- Only one survives.

Muir first explored, Then saved our first national Park, Yosemite!

The National Parks: America's Best Idea, Ken Burns directed.

Just above five leaves, Trim the dead blossoms often. Watch out for the thorns!

Ayn Rand, an author? Tiresome conservative Drivel I ignore!

How soon we forget: Past leaders acted the same As today's leaders.

Misbehaving Dems, Tax and spend without an end. What would Jesus do?

God loves SUVs And shit-kickin' country songs. Guns, guts, and glory.

Negotiating Aggressively, the Jedi Eschews violence.

Backwards Yoda speaks: English his first language not. Use the Force he must!

Mark Jackson, bully, Fired many without cause. Would Daddy approve?

Instrumental

Jo[h]n was not malign-- He just didn't give a shit Whose life he fucked up. Poor Jo[h]n, just a pawn, Revenge his favorite dish, Always served ice cold.

Get off my back, you Sad waste of human flesh, I Really despise you.

Believe in something, But not what they dream about; Their dreams are evil.

Complete innocence, My Kindergarten mind-state. Why are kids so mean?

A simple table Set before my enemies, My head anointed.

May the twenty-first, Harold Camping said, "It's done." Sinners, best repent. May the twenty-one, Party time for ev'ryone. Sinners, best repent.

Tied up, fourteen-all. Coiled tight, yet poised, until He hears, "Ready . . . fence!"