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Dick Don't Know

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Still struggling with this one…
Maybe not possible to make this work in a country song…MY DICK DON’T KNOW SHE’S GONE

  1. She’s been gone for three years now. Three years since she walked out
    Friends and folks I work with ask me what it’s all about
    Tho I can’t find an answer as the days drag on and on
    My heart is damned near petrified, but my dick don’t know she’s gone

If it weren’t for masturbation this would be a dangerous place
Without my imagination and the memory of her face
And the thot of her sweet body comforts long before the dawn
My heart cries out for Peggy, but my dick don’t know she’s gone

CHORUS 1

I would give a hundred dollars to a girl I saw last night
For an hour of her attention and a chance to touch her light
So, I just take, for memory’s sake. a picture and move on
I take it home and when I’m alone, my dick don’t know she’s gone.

  1. Sometimes I wonder why the feeling seems so close, so real
    Like I could reach and touch her, the way I used to feel
    That sense of satisfaction and the strength to carry on
    Now I understand that I’m just a man and my dick don’t know she’s gone.

My dick don’t seem to notice, as if to say, “Relax, we’re fine.
Don’t ask, ‘France or California?’ Just enjoy the wine.”
So, I don’t go getting picky. I let the memories linger on
So my future’s past. It could not last but my dick don’t know she’s gone.

CHORUS 2

I can fluff my pillow. Pretend to sleep in her embrace
Wake up in the morning, finding not a trace
But it doesn’t stop the feeling deep down in my bones
My heart’s too smart. It feels the dart but my dick don’t know she’s gone.

  1. My dick don’t even miss her because he hasn’t missed a beat
    He’s not the smartest Richard that hangs out on this street
    But then how could he notice, you see, he’s blind and deaf and dumb
    Ever since my stroke, it ain’t no joke, my dick don’t know she’s gone

If it weren’t for masturbation this world would be on fire
If you say you haven’t tried it I wll say you are a liar
So, let’s stop the flagellation, the threat of devil’s spawn
I accept the truth, that I’ve lost you, but my dick don’t know you’re gone.

© 2013 Royal T Music

James Michael Taylor's avatar
James Michael Taylor said

"...you're such a Master Craftsman ." Kelly Cutler

terrysongs's avatar
terrysongs said

Maybe Kid Rock might could record it.

Guest said

This is an awful song!

another cultural landslide's avatar
another cultural landslide said

LMAO! w;-)

mmi's avatar
mmi said

lmao! this is awesome!

kirklynch's avatar
kirklynch said

HAHA! Now THAT is what country music should be!

Guest said

Sounds pretty country to me! :-) Nice one, JMT.

Guest said

Oh James, you need to get out more darlin. Having said that, I think it works in a country song well. You are outragious! ha, faved!

Mrs. Nussbaum's Credit Card's avatar
Mrs. Nussbaum's Credit Card said

reminds me of "I"m Sorry You Married an Asshole"

Mrs. Nussbaum's Credit Card's avatar
Mrs. Nussbaum's Credit Card said

this could be a huge radio hit.

Saved!